How understanding your loved one’s dementia helps communication

Dementia advice

If you find communicating with a loved one with dementia challenging, learning more about the type of dementia they have can help.

That’s because the areas of the brain affected by dementia - and the difficulties experienced as a result - depend on the type of dementia as well as other factors, like the person’s previous skills and abilities.

Taking time to understand more about their dementia, how it’s affecting their brain and their unique experience can help explain why communication becomes difficult and how making a few small changes can make a significant difference.

In the video below, relatives of Care UK residents explain how finding the person behind the dementia has helped them to communicate with less stress.

Finding the person behind the dementia

How to find the person behind the dementia

At Care UK we like to remind people to consider the dementia, but to always remember the person. If you always had a humorous relationship with your loved one, you may find you can use humour to communicate as their dementia progresses.

If your loved one always enjoyed animals, bringing your pet along to your visit may help you to connect without using words.

How dementia can impact the brain

Changes to the brain can interrupt the chemical messages that help us think, speak, and understand. As these messages take longer to reach their destination, communication can naturally become more challenging.

These changes can cause difficulties for those living with dementia, including:

Increasing memory loss
Being unable to recall the names of family members
Difficulty with concentration or co-ordination
Becoming very angry or emotional for no apparent reason
Not being able to regulate actions and reactions, including the content of speech

People with advanced dementia can experience what is called an ‘altered reality’, or episodes where their brain makes sense of the world based on the reality of their younger self.

Altered realities can cause the world to appear very different for people living with dementia. This can also happen because of perceptual difficulties or hallucinations.

Sometimes, a person may not recognise their adult children, or they may ask for a relative who has passed away. These moments can be painful, but it is important to understand that this is due to changes occurring in the brain.

Trying to bring the person back to the present day is rarely helpful and can cause more distress. People living with dementia can often recognise and enjoy spending time with those who are significant to them, even if they cannot correctly identify them by name.

The difficulties a person living with dementia experiences can also vary depending on the type of dementia they have and their individual personality, experiences and preferences.

The Big Dementia Conversation

We want to get the nation talking about dementia and some of the most difficult topics associated with the condition.

Download our guide, Staying connected: A guide to dementia-friendly conversations, or explore more articles in our online advice hub to take a closer look at communicating with a loved one with dementia. You can also discover more advice and support on our dementia help & advice page.

The Big Dementia Conversation