Staying connected with a person with dementia using all the senses

While you’re speaking, using visuals can be helpful for someone living with dementia. For example, use pictures of the people or places you’re talking about. Photos of familiar places, such as holiday destinations and workplaces; or significant items associated with hobbies, such as gardening equipment or dance shoes, can be helpful conversation starters. 

It’s also useful to gesture to the objects you’re talking about. Hold up a cup when asking a person if they would like a drink of tea. If you’re helping them to decide between two jumpers, lay them both out to give a visual choice. 

And don’t forget about your own body language and facial expressions. These can share a lot of information - and you can also learn from watching your loved ones. 

How sight can change with dementia 

Dementia can affect the parts of the brain that process what the eyes see, so your loved one may find it harder to distinguish colours or recognise familiar objects. This can be confusing or upsetting, so it’s helpful to avoid activities that rely heavily on visual perception. 

At times, a person’s actions may indicate that they are not able to see objects around them. In many cases, the eyes are healthy - it’s the brain that has trouble making sense of what is seen. 

For example, someone may be unable to find a cup of tea in front of them without help. It is also important to be aware that our eyesight generally deteriorates as part of natural ageing, which can add to these challenges

Sounds are often closely tied to memories, and something as simple as your voice can remain familiar to a person living with dementia even if they don’t recognise you. 

If a conversation isn’t flowing, you could try reading to your loved one, especially from books with rhythmic patterns like hymns and poems. Music can also be incredibly important. A playlist of familiar songs can be a great way to connect with your loved one. 

Familiar sounds can be useful for a person living with dementia, too, such as the clatter of plates at dinnertime. However, remember that background noise is best kept to a minimum. When there is a lot of background noise, a person with dementia may struggle to understand what is being said or appear to ignore others.

Scents and tastes can have so many benefits, from evoking happy memories to having a relaxing influence. Try burning scented candles and guessing the smell together, sniffing flowers in the gardens, doing a spot of baking, tasting fruit with your eyes closed or putting on a scent you used to wear. 

Sensory gardens can be fantastic spaces to enjoy the fresh air while engaging the senses. For many, the scents of the herbs and the taste of fresh grown vegetables have a calming effect.

Physical touch can be an effective way of communicating - but never force it. A once-formal person might become more tactile as their dementia progresses, whereas someone who used to be affectionate might become more reserved. Be as tactile as your loved one wants you to be. 

If physical touch has a calming and reassuring effect, offering something simple like a massage or manicure can be an easy way to achieve this. Receiving caring attention from another person can be hugely powerful, offering a person living with dementia affection and reassurance that makes them feel valued.